The Bathroom Blues

Trouble with a Capital 'M' #2

Cyclops barged into the bathroom and ran for the toilet. He had just dropped his pants when a noise came from behind him. He turned his head to look over his shoulder, and his jaw dropped open at what he saw. He grabbed his pants and pulled them up. He ran out of the bathroom only to find Morph and Cannonball waiting for their turns in the bathroom.

"What's wrong, Scott?" Morph asked.

"Ya look like you've seen a ghost!" Sam exclaimed.

"No, worse!" Scott cried. "There's a dragon in the toilet!!!"

"You're crazy, fearless leader!" Morph exclaimed.

Cannonball dismissed the idea, "There ain't no such things as dragons!"

"Tell that to the dragon!" Scott exclaimed.

Morph and Cannonball exchanged a Look, then headed into the bathroom. They stared in disbelief at the toilet. "Ah don't believe it," Sam whispered. Morph just shook his head in disbelief.

There sat a dragon on the toilet! His scaly tail whipped around excitedly as he licked his lips at the two mutants and played with the plunger. Sam and Morph looked on as the dragon smacked its lips and then licked them again. Two seconds later, the men almost knocked Scott down running out of the bathroom.

They looked at each other. Eventually, Morph asked, "What're we gonna do now, oh fearless leader?"

Finally, Scott cried, "Jean!"

Morph joined in, "Celina!"

Sam followed their examples. "Jubes!"

In the kitchen, three women looked at each other in frustration and sighed. "What's their problem this time?" Jubilee complained.

"I love Morph will all my heart, but he's driving me crazy!" Celina exclaimed.

Jean nodded. "I agree, girls, but we'd better find out what their problem is."

"What's the problem, darling?" Celina called out to Morph.

They didn't have long to wait before receiving their answer. "There's a dragon in the toilet!"

"Very funny, guys," Jubilee replied dryly.

"No, really, there is!"

"Dragons are real," Celina admitted, "but what would one be doing in the toilet of all places?"

"I dunno, but it is!"

Jean sighed, "I don't believe them any more than ya'll do, but I am not cleaning Scott's drawers out again today!"

A minute later, Scott and Jean Grey-Summers, Morph and Celina Lewis, Sam Guthrie, and Jubilation Lee were all gathered outside the bathroom door. "I swear there is a dragon in the toilet, Jeannie!"

"Calm down, Scott. We're here now," Jean answered, patting his shoulder.

"We'll take care of it," Celina promised, kissing Morph on the cheek.

"Yeah," Jubes chimed in, "we won't let the big bad dragon getcha!" It was all she could do to suppress a giggle.

Jean turned and walked into the bathroom. Celina and Jubilee followed her. Cyclops, Morph, and Cannonball trailed behind their women. Sure enough, there was a dragon sitting on the toilet, playing with the plunger!

"Who are you?" Jean demanded.

The dragon suddenly yelled, "I'm coming, Your Majesty!" It flushed itself down the toilet without another look at the six bewildered X-Men.

"See we told you!" Scott exclaimed.

"But who was he?" Jubilee asked.

"Scratch that," Celina said. "Why was he in the toilet?"

"His name is Wickes," Jean answered. "

"How do ya know?" Morph asked.

"I read its mind just before it left."

"You mean it actually had a brain?"

"All creatures have minds, Sam," Celina told him. "Some just neglect to use them."

"But why was he here?"

"I don't know what he was doing here instead of bothering the Turtles," Jean answered.


Jean Grey-Summers, Scott Summers alias Cyclops, Morph, Sam Guthrie alias Cannonball, and Jubilation Lee alias Jubilee are all (C) & TM Marvel Comics and are used without permission. Wickes and the Turtles are (C) & TM Cheer and are used without permission. Celina Lewis is (C) & TM Queen Jubes and is used with permission. Celina may not be used without Queen Jubes' permission. I make no money whatsoever off this story.

Mail the author, Snowy Icicles, with comments!